Feminine energy is a powerful force that resides within all of us. It is the energy of creativity, intuition, magic, receptivity, and chaos.
However, over many, many centuries, true feminine energy has been shunned, shamed, suppressed, silenced, and distorted. And in its place, a more patriarchal view of “femininity” has come to be the accepted norm.
This kind of feminine energy looks more like sensitivity, softness, collaboration, gentleness, and surrender.
But that’s only part of the picture.
In our fast-paced and often masculine-dominated society, it can be challenging to tap into our authentic feminine energy and allow it to flow freely.
In this article, we will explore 10 things to STOP doing in order to increase feminine energy. Because many of us are unknowingly blocking our feminine energy by engaging in certain behaviors and thought patterns. By letting go of these habits, we can unlock our full potential and embrace the power of our feminine energy.
And to be clear: We’re talking about the rich, raw power of the feminine, and not the watered-down soft side that you may be expecting…
What is feminine energy?
Feminine energy is life force energy.
Feminine energy is light and dark, love and fear, beauty and ugliness. She is youth and age. She is receptivity and she is force.
The deep feminine (as Oracular Poet Maya Luna describes it) is immanence. She exists in the moment, in every ebb and flow, every inhale and exhale.
She is birth.
She is death.
And she is every dripping, oozing, messy piece of presence and truth in between: She is the Great Mother.
So true feminine energy has little to do with “femininity” as our popular culture, media, and advertising would lead you to believe.
The messaging that most women have received our whole lives is that the feminine is the “good girl. It’s sitting pretty and doing as you’re told. It’s letting men make decisions, while you look (in equal parts) motherly and seductive when it suits.
We’ve been told feminine energy is sensitive, nurturing, receptive, soft, loving and patient.
But that’s not entirely true…
Real, authentic feminine energy is also sensual, pleasure-full, passionate, devoted, magical and mysterious, angry, fearsome, transformational, chaotic, and destructive.
Real feminine energy is the presence of the Goddess.
Want more on divine feminine energy?
Read this post next – 20 Essential Traits of the Divine Feminine
How to increase your feminine energy
So how can we awaken these fiery, powerful and oh-so-necessary feminine traits, especially when some of them hold so much shame and misunderstanding?
Well rather than heaping another list of practices, methods and tools to use, how about lightening the load?
Here’s a list of 10 things to STOP doing, to awaken your feminine energy:
Stop ignoring your intuition.
Stop trying to control everything.
Stop being overly critical of yourself and others.
Stop comparing yourself to others.
Stop neglecting your physical body.
Stop living in the past or worrying about the future.
Stop limiting yourself with negative self-talk and beliefs.
Stop seeking validation from others.
Stop suppressing your emotions.
Stop playing small.
You DO want a list of things to action?!
Read this post next: How to tap into Feminine Energy (25 Unconventional Tips)
1. Stop suppressing your emotions
Suppressing emotions is a really common behavior that many women engage in, often without realizing it.
Maybe you do this to avoid confrontation (umm, people pleasing much?) Maybe you’ve just never been taught to feel? Or maybe you were actively discouraged from engaging with your emotional self?
Regardless of the reasons, suppressing emotions can actually be a HUGE block to your feminine energy. It’s denying what’s there, what’s true and what’s real.
Shutting yourself off from what you feel will prevent you from fully experiencing life, and (as mentioned above) from the presence of the Goddess,
Tips for allowing emotions to flow freely:
Try journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a powerful way to process and release emotions. Set aside time each day to journal and allow yourself to express whatever comes up.
Increase your capacity to feel: You can build your capacity to feel and hold emotions over time. Like a muscle, practice holding big feelings in your body, and over time you’ll find it gets a lot easier.
Seek support: Talking to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can help you process and release emotions in a safe and supportive environment.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind and gentle with yourself when you experience difficult emotions. Rather than judging or criticizing yourself, offer yourself compassion and understanding.
2. Stop trying to control everything
In our fast-paced and often unpredictable world, it’s natural to want to control as much as possible.
However, trying to control everything can actually hinder the expression of feminine energy. When we try to control everything, we limit our ability to be spontaneous, creative, and intuitive.
Tips for letting go and allowing things to unfold naturally:
Practice surrender: Surrendering means letting go of the need to control and trusting that everything will work out as it’s meant to. Practice surrendering by repeating a mantra such as “I trust the universe to guide me.”
Embrace uncertainty: Uncertainty can be scary, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and learning. Embrace uncertainty by trying new things and being open to different outcomes.
Let go of perfectionism: Perfectionism can be a form of control, as we try to control every aspect of a situation to ensure a perfect outcome. Try to embrace imperfection and learn from mistakes.
Practice gratitude: Gratitude can help us shift our focus from what we can’t control to what we are grateful for in the present moment. Practice gratitude by keeping a gratitude journal or simply taking time each day to reflect on what you’re thankful for.
3. Stop putting others’ needs before your own
Most women are taught to prioritize the needs of others before their own.
While it’s important to be compassionate and caring towards others, putting others’ needs before our own can actually limit our authentic feminine energy. Ultimately, it can prevent us from fully embracing our own needs and desires, so that we never reach our potential.
By prioritizing self-care, you can increase your feminine energy by better connecting to yourself and your needs. And, when we take care of ourselves, we are better able to care for others and make a positive impact in the world.
Tips for self-love and self-care:
Set boundaries: Setting boundaries can help you protect your energy and prioritize your own needs. Practice saying “no” when you need to and communicate your boundaries clearly to others.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind and gentle with yourself, especially when you’re going through a difficult time. Treat yourself with the same compassion and understanding that you would offer to a close friend.
Prioritize rest and relaxation: Rest and relaxation are essential for our physical and mental well-being. Make time for activities that help you relax, such as reading, taking a ritual bath, or meditating.
Engage in activities that bring you joy: Doing things that bring you joy can help you connect with your feminine energy and feel more alive and energized.
Make time for activities that you enjoy, such as dancing, painting, or spending time in nature.
4. Stop seeking external validation and approval
Seeking external validation and approval is a common behavior that many of us engage in, often without realizing it.
Women tend to do this to feel accepted, loved, or valued.
However, relying on external validation can actually limit our feminine energy because it prevent us from fully trusting our intuition and inner wisdom.
Tips for trusting your own intuition and inner wisdom:
Practice self-reflection: Take time to reflect on your values, beliefs, and goals. Ask yourself what is truly important to you and what you want to achieve in life.
Listen to your body: Our bodies often give us signals about what we need and want. Pay attention to your body’s signals and trust your gut instincts.
Embrace your uniqueness: You are a unique individual with your own set of talents, strengths, and quirks! Embrace your uniqueness and trust that you have something valuable to offer the world.
Practice self-validation: Rather than seeking validation from others, learn to validate yourself. Acknowledge your own accomplishments and strengths, and celebrate your successes.
5. Stop being overly critical of yourself and others
Do you have a fierce inner critic?!
Many of us have a running dialogue of self-depreciating words, without ever stopping to question it.
When we are overly critical, we limit our ability to be kind, compassionate, and nurturing towards ourselves and others. Yet by practicing self-compassion and kindness, we can radically increase the feminine energy flowing through our lives!
Tips for cultivating kindness and compassion:
Practice self-awareness: Become aware of your self-talk and notice when you’re being overly critical. Challenge negative self-talk by asking yourself if it’s really true or if there’s another way to look at the situation.
Practice forgiveness: Forgive yourself and others for mistakes and shortcomings. Holding onto grudges or resentment can block our feminine energy and prevent us from fully embracing life.
Practice gratitude: Gratitude can help shift our focus from what we don’t have to what we do have. Take time each day to reflect on what you’re thankful for and express gratitude towards yourself and others.
Practice empathy: Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. Practice empathy by putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and imagining what they might be going through.
Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself is an act of kindness and compassion towards yourself. Make time for activities that help you relax, such as reading, taking a bath, or meditating.
6. Stop comparing yourself to others
Comparing ourselves to others is a surprisingly common behavior that really does limit our feminine energy. It prevents us from fully embracing our unique qualities and talents.
When we compare ourselves to others, we focus on what we lack rather than what we have to offer. By embracing our unique qualities and talents, we can free the flow of feminine energy through our lives…
Tips for embracing your unique qualities and talents:
Practice self-awareness: Become aware of your strengths, weaknesses, and unique qualities. Write them down and reflect on them regularly.
Practice self-acceptance: Accept yourself for who you are, flaws and all. Recognize that no one is perfect and that your imperfections make you unique.
Practice self-expression: Express yourself in a way that feels authentic to you. Whether it’s through writing, art, music, or dance, find a way to express yourself that feels true to who you are.
Surround yourself with positive people: Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you. Avoid people who bring you down or make you feel inferior.
7. Stop being afraid to ask for help or support
Asking for help or support can be difficult, especially if we’ve been taught to be self-sufficient and independent.
However, being vulnerable and asking for help can actually increase our feminine energy and help us connect more deeply with others. By allowing ourselves to be supported, we can tap into our intuition, empathy, and nurturing qualities.
Tips for seeking help and support when needed:
Practice being vulnerable: Vulnerability is the willingness to be open and honest about our feelings and needs. Practice vulnerability by sharing your thoughts and feelings with someone you trust.
Identify your support system: Identify people in your life who are supportive and trustworthy. Reach out to them when you need help or support.
Practice active listening: Active listening means fully engaging with someone and giving them your full attention. Practice active listening by listening to others without judgment and offering support and empathy.
Seek professional help: Sometimes, we need more than just the support of friends and family. Seek professional help from a therapist or counselor if you’re struggling with a mental health issue or need additional support.
8. Stop neglecting your physical body
Our physical bodies are SUCH an essential part of our being! Yet many women neglect our physical bodies, distracted by our busy lives.
Neglecting our physical health can limit our feminine energy and prevent us from fully embracing life. But it goes a lot deeper than this – our bodies hold so much wisdom and generations of deep knowledge.
By taking care of our physical bodies, and learning to listen to them, we can increase our feminine energy by tapping into a wellspring of knowledge.
Tips for exercising, eating well, and getting enough rest:
Exercise regularly: Regular exercise is essential for our physical and mental well-being. Find an exercise that you enjoy, such as yoga, dancing, or hiking, and make it a regular part of your routine.
Eat a balanced diet: Eating a balanced diet that includes plenty of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean protein can help you feel energized and nourished. Avoid processed foods and sugary drinks, which can leave you feeling sluggish and tired.
Get enough rest: Rest is essential for our physical and mental health. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep each night and take time to rest and relax during the day.
Try somatic experiencing: Practice living your life in a more embodied way. Experience situations through your five senses, and not through the intellect. Allow sensation to be what guides and informs you.
Listen to your body: Our bodies often give us signals about what we need and want. Pay attention to your body’s signals and trust your gut instincts.
Interested in sensuality?
Read this post next – Who is the Sensualist Archetype? (and 5 Ways to Seduce Yourself)
9. Stop living in the past or worrying about the future
Living in the past or worrying about the future can prevent us from fully embracing the present moment.
When we’re stuck in the past or worrying about the future, we limit our ability to be present, creative, and intuitive. By staying present and enjoying the journey, we can increase our feminine energy and become more connected to ourselves and those around us.
Tips for staying present and enjoying the journey:
Engage your senses: Engage your senses by noticing the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures around you. Focus on the present moment and fully immerse yourself in your surroundings.
Practice gratitude: Gratitude can help us shift our focus from what we don’t have to what we do have. Take time each day to reflect on what you’re thankful for and express gratitude towards the present moment.
Let go of the past: Letting go of the past can be difficult, but it’s essential for our well-being. Practice forgiveness, both towards yourself and others, and focus on the present moment rather than dwelling on the past.
Embrace uncertainty: Uncertainty can be scary, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and learning. Embrace uncertainty by trying new things and being open to different outcomes.
10 Stop limiting yourself with negative self-talk and beliefs
Negative self-talk and limiting beliefs can hold us back from fully embracing our feminine energy and reaching our full potential.
When we believe that we’re not good enough or that we can’t achieve our goals, we limit our ability to be creative, intuitive, and confident.
By believing in ourselves and our potential, we can increase our feminine energy and become more connected to ourselves.
Tips for believing in yourself and your potential:
Focus on your strengths: Focus on your strengths and what you’re good at. Recognize that everyone has weaknesses and that your strengths make you unique.
Set realistic goals: Set realistic goals that are achievable and align with your values and passions. Break these goals down into smaller steps and celebrate your progress along the way.
Surround yourself with positive people: Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you. Avoid people who bring you down or make you feel inferior.
Practice self-compassion: Be kind and gentle with yourself when you’re struggling. Offer yourself the same support and compassion that you would offer to a close friend.
By believing in ourselves and our potential, we can increase our feminine energy and become more connected to ourselves.
When we focus on our strengths and what we have to offer, we can make a positive impact in the world and lead a more fulfilling life.
Embracing your feminine energy is essential for living a fulfilling and meaningful life
By letting go of certain behaviors and beliefs, we can increase our feminine energy and become more connected to ourselves and those around us.
It’s important to remember that these changes won’t happen overnight, but with practice and patience, we can increase our feminine energy and become more connected to ourselves.
Embrace your unique qualities and talents, seek help and support when needed, and believe in yourself and your potential.
By practicing these tips, we can live a life that is authentic, fulfilling, and connected to our feminine energy.
So, let’s embrace our feminine energy and make a positive impact in the world!